can bk fr the bintan off site and i was simply horrified.
i also kanna tekan by the head of sales cos he's high and just because i mentioned the word bankers which he frowns upon as segregation of rank...
i feel like shite..
and im sick and studyin for my MAS modules right nw...
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Im scared
of work tommorrow.
i have no one to confide into ..i feel very vulnerable and lost..
why do i always have to encounter bitches and selfishness wherever i start?
why the newbies that i know dont get this treatment...
i wish i had someone to encourgae me and counsel me right nw
i have no one to confide into ..i feel very vulnerable and lost..
why do i always have to encounter bitches and selfishness wherever i start?
why the newbies that i know dont get this treatment...
i wish i had someone to encourgae me and counsel me right nw
Again..
i cant seem to confide in him on my feelings nor can i feedback abt him with regards to this relationship..
example: we never do the things that i want..like i want to watch a movie, eat my favourite frog legs..
and tonight's dinner, was what do you want to eat..you order...
this was not what i intended.
what i wanted was more initiative to do things that im fond of instead of doing all that he is fond of.
not the first time he doesnt see my point of view at all...
nt the very least..
saddening...nw its things like this that eats whatever pathetic balance of intimacy we have..he still flares and throws his tantrums...
he sprained his back, i washed his bike, bathed him, boughht him dinner, walked his dog..and when he asked me to get his pain killer just when i was lying down, i sd give me a while...
and he flared up...
ad said forget it
TO hell with you on ur childishness
example: we never do the things that i want..like i want to watch a movie, eat my favourite frog legs..
and tonight's dinner, was what do you want to eat..you order...
this was not what i intended.
what i wanted was more initiative to do things that im fond of instead of doing all that he is fond of.
not the first time he doesnt see my point of view at all...
nt the very least..
saddening...nw its things like this that eats whatever pathetic balance of intimacy we have..he still flares and throws his tantrums...
he sprained his back, i washed his bike, bathed him, boughht him dinner, walked his dog..and when he asked me to get his pain killer just when i was lying down, i sd give me a while...
and he flared up...
ad said forget it
TO hell with you on ur childishness
Thursday, September 9, 2010
2nd day at work
spent my day reading again on the online materials of risk related, aml related..the usual policies.
after 6 hours on my ass reading, i asked her if i could just sit in with her cos im really tired of reading..she paused..thought and said nooo
**i was stunned**
when she brought me around to meet some dept folks, after the 10th pair of hands i shook, i told her that my hands were getting clammy, could i meet the rest another day?
she said noo..cos she's in the mood for introducing and she doesnt care 2 hoots if my hands were wet and that my confidence was slowly erroding away.
after 6 hours on my ass reading, i asked her if i could just sit in with her cos im really tired of reading..she paused..thought and said nooo
**i was stunned**
when she brought me around to meet some dept folks, after the 10th pair of hands i shook, i told her that my hands were getting clammy, could i meet the rest another day?
she said noo..cos she's in the mood for introducing and she doesnt care 2 hoots if my hands were wet and that my confidence was slowly erroding away.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
1st day at my new work place
sucks!
1. aircon at my seat was so cold and it was blowing at my head all day. My teeth was chattering. It was really that cold
2. i spent my whole morning to mid afternoon reading policies and front office procedures
3. my lunch sucks. they ate so lil and were so PR to the CA.
4. I was thought hw to input a FX deal. When i asked how to read the bid and ask, the mentor said the rates are fluctuating and she couldnt explained. That was not what i meant. and she said its like arbitrage..i was like huh..okay explain arbitrage in this context. Mentor urms..and said its a very text book term...hw abt u google it.
what the F***
5. im suffering fr a cold and i sleep deprivated from last night. too anxious abt starting work until i slept at 3:45a tossing and turning and worrying
Tomm the eve to a long weekend..please pull me through
1. aircon at my seat was so cold and it was blowing at my head all day. My teeth was chattering. It was really that cold
2. i spent my whole morning to mid afternoon reading policies and front office procedures
3. my lunch sucks. they ate so lil and were so PR to the CA.
4. I was thought hw to input a FX deal. When i asked how to read the bid and ask, the mentor said the rates are fluctuating and she couldnt explained. That was not what i meant. and she said its like arbitrage..i was like huh..okay explain arbitrage in this context. Mentor urms..and said its a very text book term...hw abt u google it.
what the F***
5. im suffering fr a cold and i sleep deprivated from last night. too anxious abt starting work until i slept at 3:45a tossing and turning and worrying
Tomm the eve to a long weekend..please pull me through
Saturday, June 5, 2010
My heart is twisted in twines..i do not know what i should do.
i wanted to start afresh but the tears and remorse burnt the resolve i had
i couldnt bear a grudge but neither could i forget what he has done to me on all days but that.
how could anyone do such a thing.
and nw i find myself dining with him again.
he spoke to me about a proposal diamond which his friend has brought in..
hw could he even think of proposing when we had barely recovered fr the mess that he had put me through
i told him that i can not accept and i would not view the diamond with him today
he told me that he doesnt want to buy a new car anymore so he could have more $ saved for our future
but guess what he did today. he spent $3k without a flinch on a Sram XX groupset.
why do u need it when u already have the top 2nd best?
this #$3k what part of the $ i withdrew fr our joint a/c to him when i closed our joint account.
it was a right thing to do so parting would not be so messy
i just said "wow" $3k...
hw do i settle with him?
i could let him go..but i chose to let him rein me back
why am i so weak!
so sentimental
i wanted to start afresh but the tears and remorse burnt the resolve i had
i couldnt bear a grudge but neither could i forget what he has done to me on all days but that.
how could anyone do such a thing.
and nw i find myself dining with him again.
he spoke to me about a proposal diamond which his friend has brought in..
hw could he even think of proposing when we had barely recovered fr the mess that he had put me through
i told him that i can not accept and i would not view the diamond with him today
he told me that he doesnt want to buy a new car anymore so he could have more $ saved for our future
but guess what he did today. he spent $3k without a flinch on a Sram XX groupset.
why do u need it when u already have the top 2nd best?
this #$3k what part of the $ i withdrew fr our joint a/c to him when i closed our joint account.
it was a right thing to do so parting would not be so messy
i just said "wow" $3k...
hw do i settle with him?
i could let him go..but i chose to let him rein me back
why am i so weak!
so sentimental
Friday, November 27, 2009
Im on my way to watch Twilight the saga-New Moon
Oh my goodness...i never thought that i would actually watch a chick flick but ever since i watched the trailer, i was swooning over the romance portion of the plot. I guess its intensity and the vampy mysteria is what attracted me to watch it. Im watching it alone..which is a choice i made. I cant imagine him watching the show with me..Guys wont understand la
and i can finally eat pop corn! or maybe the cheesy nachos without felix saying NO to the unhealthy snacks.
Felix is off cycling at ubin..as usual..without me just becos we had a senseless quarrel this morning. He's self centred..blah blah blah..and i can go on and on and on abt that.
argh!
he's so emo!
Im looking forward to 2010..cant wait for 2009 to end..
and i can finally eat pop corn! or maybe the cheesy nachos without felix saying NO to the unhealthy snacks.
Felix is off cycling at ubin..as usual..without me just becos we had a senseless quarrel this morning. He's self centred..blah blah blah..and i can go on and on and on abt that.
argh!
he's so emo!
Im looking forward to 2010..cant wait for 2009 to end..
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